Gee Mail

All that stuff that the grandparents forward….

Winsconsin Redneck

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ABSOLUTELY A TRUE STORY
HEARD ON A WISCONSIN RADIO STATION REPORTING ON THE INCIDENT.

A guy buys a new Lincoln Navigator for $42,500.00 with monthly payments of
$560.00. He and a friend go duck hunting in upper Wisconsin
.
It's mid-winter and of course all of the lakes are frozen.

These two guys go out on the ice with their GUNS, a DOG,
and of course the new Navigator. They decide they want to make a natural
looking open water area for the ducks to focus on, something for the decoys
to float on.

Now making a hole in the ice large enough to invite a
passing duck, is going to take a little more power than the average drill
auger
can produce. So out of the back of the new Navigator comes a stick of
dynamite with a short 40 second-fuse.

Our two Rocket Scientists afraid they might slip on the ice while trying to
run away after lighting the fuse decide on the following course of action:
they light the 40 second fuse; then, with a mighty thrust, they throw the
stick of dynamite as
far away as possible.

Remember a couple of paragraphs back when I mentioned the
NAVIGATOR, the GUNS, and the DOG...?

Let's talk about the dog:

A highly trained Black Lab used for RETRIEVING; especially
things thrown by the owner.

You guessed it/ The dog takes off across the ice at a high
rate of speed and grabs the stick of dynamite, with the burning 40-second
fuse just as it hits the ice.

The two men swallow, blink, start waving their arms and, with veins in their
necks swelling to resemble stalks of rhubarb, scream and
holler at the dog to stop.

The dog, now apparently cheered on by his master, keeps
coming.

One hunter panics, grabs the shotgun and shoots the dog.
The shotgun is loaded with #8 bird shot, hardly big enough to stop a Black
Lab.

The dog stops for a moment, slightly confused, then
continues on.

Another shot, and this time the dog, still standing,
becomes really confused and of course terrified, thinks these two geniuses
have
gone insane!!!!!!

The dog takes off to find cover, UNDER the brand new Navigator.

The men continue to scream as they run. The red hot exhaust
pipe on the truck touches the dog's rear end. He yelps, drops the
dynamite under the truck and takes off after his master.

Then KA BOOOOOOOOOOOOM!

The truck is blown to bits and sinks to the bottom of the
lake, leaving the two idiots standing there with 'I can't believe this just
happened' looks on their faces.

The insurance company says that sinking a vehicle in a lake
by illegal use of explosives is NOT COVERED by the policy. And the owner
still had yet to make the first of those $560.00 a month payments.

The dog is okay....doing fine.

And you thought all Rednecks lived in the South...
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