Gee Mail

All that stuff that the grandparents forward….

Tech Support

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Tech Support:What kind of computer do you have?

Customer: A white one.

……………………………………….

.

Customer: Hi, this is Celine. I can’t get my DVD

out !!!

Tech Support: Have you tried pushing the button?

Customer: Yes, I’m sure it’s really stuck.

Tech Support: That doesn’t sound good; I’ll make a note.

Customer: No, wait a minute, I hadn’t inserted it

yet. It’s still on my desk . . . sorry. Thank you.

……………………………………….

.

Tech Support: Click on the ‘MY COMPUTER’ icon on the

left of the screen.

Customer: Your left or my left?

………………………………………

.

Tech Support: Hello. How may I help you?

Male Customer: Hi .. . . I can’t print.

Tech Support: Would you click on ‘START’ for me and . .

Customer: Listen pal; don’t start getting technical on

me. I’m not Billi Gates!!!

………………………………………

.

Customer: Good afternoon, this is Martha. I can’t

print. Every time I try, it says . . . ‘CAN’T FIND

PRINTER’. I even lifted the printer and placed it

in front of the monitor, but the computer still

says it can’t find it!!!

……………………………………….

.

Customer: I have problems printing in red.

Tech Support: Do you have a color printer?

Customer: Aaaah . . . . . .. . . . . thank you.

……………………………………….

.

Tech Support: What’s on your monitor now, ma’am?

Customer: A teddy bear that my boyfriend bought for

me at the 7-11 store.

………………………………………..

.

Customer: My keyboard is not working anymore.

Tech Support: Are you sure your keyboard is plugged

into the computer?

Customer: No. I can’t get behind the computer.

Tech Support: Pick up your keyboard and take ten

steps backwards.

Customer: Okay..

Tech Support: Did the keyboard come with you?

Customer: Yes.

Tech Support: That means the keyboard is not plugged

in. Is there another keyboard?

Customer: Yes, there’s another one here. Wait a

moment please. . .. . . . . Ah, that one does work.

Thanks.

……………………………………….

.

Tech Support: Your password is the small letter ‘a’ as in

apple, a capital letter ‘V’ as in Victor, and the number ‘7’.

Customer: Is that ‘7’ in capital letters?

………………………………………

.

Customer: I can’t get on the Internet.

Tech Support: Are you absolutely sure you used the

correct password?

Customer: Yes, I’m sure I saw my co-worker do it.

Tech Support: Can you tell me what the password was?

Customer: Five dots.

………………………………………

.

Tech Support: What anti-virus program do you use?

Customer: Netscape

Tech Support: That’s not an anti-virus program.

Customer: Oh, sorry . . . Internet Explorer.

……………………………………….

.

Customer: I have a huge problem! My friend has

placed a screen saver on my computer . . . but,

every time I move my mouse, it disappears.

……………………………………….

.

Tech Support: How may I help you?

Customer: I’m writing my first email.

Tech Support: OK, and what seems to be the problem?

Customer: Well, I have the letter ‘a’ in the address,

but how do I get the little circle around it.

……………………………………….

.

A woman customer called the Canon help desk because

she had a problem with her printer.

Tech Support: Are you running it under windows?

Customer: No, my desk is next to the door, but that

is a good point. The man sitting next to me is by

a window, and his printer is working fine!

………………………………………..

.

.

And last, but not least . . .

Tech Support: Okay Bob, press the control and escape

keys at the same time. That brings up a task list in the

middle of the screen. Now, type the letter ‘P’ to bring

up the Program Manager.

Customer: I don’t have a ‘P’.

Tech Support: On your keyboard, Bob.

Customer: What do you mean?

Tech Support: ‘P’ . . . on your keyboard, Bob.

Customer: I AM NOT GOING TO DO THAT!!!

………………………………………

.

This makes me feel better about my computer skills!

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